Confusion (Part 4)

To me one of the saddest side effects around the idea that men have to lead and women have to follow is that it creates an association between gender and the role people take on when they dance. While this may have been the way things had to be 100 years ago, I see absolutely no reason why this needs to continue now. There are plenty of other sports and social activities that used to be associated only with one gender and have become gender neutral over time so dancing by comparison seems to be stuck in the past. It creates this impression that in order to perform a partner dance one needs to be joining as a couple and ideally go out with that person which immediately denies this sport to a large group of people. I get at least one email a week of someone asking whether they can join our Cuban salsa classes despite the fact that they do not have a partner which makes me wonder how many people would like to join our classes but feel embarrassed to join on their own or simply do not even think of this as a possibility.

This question still surprises me every time as I think of dancing as a social activity that should bring joy to as many people as possible so to deny someone the possibility of even learning the dance for the mere fact that they do not have a partner seems paradox to me. That being said, I remember how I had my first ballroom dancing experience in high school where my whole class decided to try out a beginner course and I had to ask someone to be my dance partner for the duration of the course as you were not allowed to join on your own. Luckily, I was not rejected so from the very beginning dancing became an enjoyable experience to me but I can only guess how the left over people felt who did not get asked or who asked and were rejected. I certainly would not blame them if they never tried out dancing again in their lifes after associating this type of memory with the sport as a whole.

I would feel awful if I ever learned that someone has had any similar type of experiences in my classes and I have always tried to make lessons as inclusive as possible. However, I am ultimately fighting against the social stigma that people have had to deal with all their lives before they join their first salsa class so time and time again I have to convince people that they can join us on their own. In addition I try to make it clear to people joining as a couple that they do not represent a static couple in my classes and that they will be expected to switch partners and roles like everybody else. While this is something I tell every person coming to their first beginner’s class, it is usually a point that people take on board with a high level of scepticism, at least until the moment they see Confusion. When they finally get to the point where they see this and dance this move their last resistance seems to melt away and they no longer see themselves as single or in a relationship or a masculine leader or a feminine follower but rather a dancer that follows the structure of the role they currently occupy. Confusion is therefore one of the best moves I have at my disposal as a teacher to make Casino a truly gender neutral experience that lets everyone enjoy each aspect of the dance.